This article is formed from a collection of research articles on the subject matter being discussed.
I must state clearly that this write up is not in anyway, aimed at reducing anyone (especially the female folk) because I know that many women (particularly women from those areas where this custom is still being practiced), after reading this, will react negatively. Rather it is a wake up call to women so that certain practices that derogate females in any form will be expunged.
Having said the above, it’ll be appropriate to first give a succinct definition of what the term ‘bride price’ is :
A bride price is a sum of money or quantity of goods given to a bride's family by that of the groom in some tribal societies.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bride_price
HISTORICAL TRACE
Bride price is an age long tradition that emanated from a voluntary act of appreciating a bride for remaining chaste till the day of her marriage which simply corroborates the biblical fact that
BRIDE PRICE IS PAID ONLY ON VIRGINS.
http://www.nairaland.com/2517836/origin-bride-price-african-tradition
Okay calm down! I’m sure that some people are already pissed while reading this because in this time and age, virginity isn't given much value. As a matter of fact, people rather boast about the number of times they've had sex to intimidate their peers. However, we must trace the origin of a thing to know the rational behind certain practices. So let's continue…
According to Africa tradition, after the groom sleeps with the lady on a white bed sheet and is confirmed that she is indeed chaste(a virgin), there will be another round of funfair where the guy will once again go to the parents of the bride with dancers and drummers but if the man sleeps with the bride and discovers she is not chaste, it will be the exact opposite where the lady will be escorted back to her parents' house with people jeering negatively at her and all the groom ever gave the parents on the lady with the hope that the lady is what he taught will be refunded and such ladies are usually banished.
UGANDA'S CUSTOM
According to
Eunice Apio http://www.monitor.co.ug/OpEd/Letters/Understand-the-origin-of-bride-price/806314-2355926-5i6w86/index.html
He has been following developments in the discourse of the use of bride price in Uganda. In the first place, the re-naming of bride price as marriage-gifts, regardless of the reason behind it, is reductionist and misleading.
Among many sub-Saharan African societies, bride price is a jural tool that is invoked in the making and unmaking of lineages (identities, if you like). This is certainly true of the Langi in northern Uganda, where the receipt of cattle by a woman’s birth family (lineage) converts her lineage to that of her husband’s.
But she can also free herself (and her fertility rights) from her husband and his lineage by invoking the same jural seal (cattle). The invocation is symbolized by the return of the cattle (seal) back to the origin (ex-husband). Only then will she reclaim her birth lineage.
A NIGERIAN CUSTOM
The average Nigerian wedding today takes four phases basically, which obviously does not mean getting married four different times to four different persons, but to the same person in four different ways, as dictated by religion, culture, tradition, and civil law.
According to
Fawehinmi, in Yoruba Land, the Introduction Ceremony is the First Phase. Families of the intending couple formally meet for acquaintances and assert their consent to the proposed marriage. Some are done in a living room setting with strictly the nuclear or immediate extended families in attendance, and for some others, only the paying of Bride Price separates this from the proper engagement ceremony. During many Introductions these days, the groom and his friends prostrate severally to the bride’s family (signifying a plea to marry their daughter), intending couple cuts the cake, spokespersons representing the bride’s family and the person standing for the groom’s side are used, gifts such as fruits, wine and drinks are exchanged and so on.)
The Second Phase is called The Traditional Wedding.
The Court Wedding is the Third Phase: This is the only form of wedding recognized by law; a legal licence for a woman to take up her man’s name and officially become “Ìyàwó Alárédè” (Legal Wife). This, in most cases, is only attended by direct relations and some friends. But if the couple intends to skip Phase Four, this might be the “big deal”.
Finally, Phase Four happens in The Church.
https://www.google.com.ng/amp/thenationonlineng.net/why-pride-price-is-important-in-marriages/amp/
COMMENTRY
Now that we've been educated on the traditional practices and customs of different places that make or made use of bride price, we have to ask ourselves a very vital question; what is the rational behind paying money to get married to a woman you love? Doesn’t it seem like women are being purchased like goods because they'll tell you that ‘if you have value for something/someone, you have to pay for it' Are u kidding me? If money isn't paid before a man can take a woman with him to start a family with, will it reduce the value of the woman? Does it make her precious or it just equates her to a good or property that needs to be valued by “purchasing” it? And to further understand the extent of the preposterousness, just like a good or item, you can return it(her) back to her parents if she is “damaged”, requesting that her purchase fee (bride price) be returned to you. This is absurd if you ask me. A woman's value should be priceless! Anyway, I don’t blame families because these days, some families use their daughters as a means of getting wealth. This is what women have been reduced to and it’s a pity. Another disappointing thing is that we don’t see female activists advocating for the abolishment of this practice. I guess they also like being bought from their parents.
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